Stuff White People Like...

Well, I visited Portland over the weekend, and visited the best bookstore on the planet (Powells) while I was there. I didn't realize it on my own, but the reason there are so many good bookstores and coffee shops in the Northwest is because it rains a lot in the winter. Umm, okay... sometimes I'm a little slow to pick up obvious things like that. But the book was entitled "Stuff White People Like" and it's a satirical take on getting to know and befriend white people. However, a lot of what the author talks about is true, and applicable to liberal folks like myself (although I don't drink coffee, or eat tofu). But anyway, here is one entry which you can also locate on the website of the same name. It's funny, because it's true that I'm a hypocrite when it comes to some corporations, so I thought I would point that out. By the way, Home Depot said that my $100 check is in the mail, so we shall see!


#82 Hating Corporations
March 5, 2008 by clander

One of the more popular white person activities of the past fifteen years is attempting to educate others on the evils of multi-national corporations. White people love nothing more than explaining to you how Wal*Mart, McDonalds, Microsoft, Halliburton are destroying the Earth’s culture and resources.
While the growth of multi-national corporations can be attributed to a number of complex social, economic and political factors, many white people prefer to take the word of two trusted sources: No Logo and AdBusters.
Published in 2000, No Logo has been responsible for more white person “enlightenment” than any book since the burning of the library at Alexandria. By reading this one magic book, white people are able to get a full grasp on the evils of multi-national corporations and then regurgitate it to friends and family.
Advanced white people will supplement No Logo with a subscription to AdBusters, where they will learn how to subvert corporate culture and return it to the masses. Specifically, this means taking ads and redoing them to give a negative message about a product. Apparently the belief is that when other people see this ad, they will be hit with an epiphany that their entire existence has been a Matrix-style manufactured universe.
If you plan to engage in lengthy conversations or get high with white people it is recommended that you read No Logo or one issue of AdBusters. Failing that, it is acceptable to buy a copy to leave on your coffee table. When white people see it, they will recognize you as someone who can see through the advertising and has a proper perspective on life.
When engaging in a conversation about corporate evils it is important to NEVER, EVER mention Apple Computers, Target or Ikea in the same breath as the companies mentioned earlier. White people prefer to hate corporations that don’t make stuff that they like.
Following these simple steps can help you gain the trust and respect of white people in a relatively short period of time.